Crying

Jeremy has been gone since Sunday, and I am a wreck! I've been sitting around crying like a child. I just miss him.

Storm rolling in. I should turn off the computer. Maybe more later.

Published again!

I don't know if I already wrote about this, and I am too lazy to check my old posts.

I am being published again!
It's just a short poem that will be published in an anthology of poetry (I know they take almost everything that is submitted), but it still feels good to know that I am taking a more active role in the process. I consider this to be another baby step toward a career in writing.
The last publication only went to the Language Arts Journal of Michigan, so only English teachers received it. Prior to that, I had small pieces published from contests in high school, as well as my letters to the editor in my school paper.

The truth shall set you free...or destroy everything!

I finally sat down with Jeremy and told him that I have many doubts about getting married. We both haven't really taken the planning seriously. He doesn't want to do anything, and I think most of the stuff is bullshit. We talked about how we both need to change, especially when it comes to keeping our home in running order.

I told him that, lately, I've definitely been noticing other men who are my type. Jeremy is exactly my type - broad-shouldered, dark brown/black hair, green eyes, taller than me - if only he didn't have the beer gut. I know that the only reason these other men are enticing is because Jeremy has been disappointing me. I don't like that, all of a sudden, I am thinking about possibilities with new people. He didn't like that, either.

We decided to create a new system for cleaning and storing things (I just made a printout of my usual checklist for cleaning, etc.). I used to have him trained. Yes, I said it - trained! That is what women do. It was when he lived in the townhouse with all of those guys (after he moved back to Michigan while I was still teaching in Florida) that every chore he was accustomed to doing was no longer an expectation. In addition, we have decided on preliminary dates (we have to check with our first, second, and third choice locations for the reception and ceremony). We looked at tuxedos. I think I have narrowed down the style of dress I want. Now, we just need to figure out who will officiate the ceremony, flowers, bridal party, etc.

I think I am finally finding some excitement in all of this.