Wesley Wagner (1989 - 2006)

Wesley W. (1989 - 2006)

I did a search on myspace for some of my very first students today, just to see if some of my predictions about the high school years would be accurate. Some were. Dead - on accurate. Others...not so much.

These particular students are now 16/17 years old and live in Sebastian, Florida. I happened to find this about Wesley, one of my favorite students.

We, as teachers, try not to pick favorites, but some students stand out and inevitably become ones we attach ourselves to. Wesley was definitely one of those few.

He was the first student whose name I learned on the very first day I taught at SRMS. When I began my first day of teaching there, he introduced himself and asked if I needed help with anything. He had a great sense of humor and was so bright. He was the most positive, sweet kid. He was eager to help pass out papers or get involved in projects with others. He was a little hyper, but he was passionate about academics and strived to be the best student in his class. He became involved in a variety of activities and continued that as he advanced in school.

He is among the top 5 from all of my years teaching (4 of the 5 actually are from his class!). I had planned to fly down to Florida in 2008 to see this particular group of students graduate. They were my students in middle school from 2002 to 2003, and I have this incredibly strong feeling of devotion to them.

Now, I don't want to go. Some of my favorites have moved away from the area, and Wesley died last summer. When I found the information on Friday, I just sat weeping. I'm not doing much better.

How can he be gone? How can he really be dead? Why didn't the teachers at SRMS contact me when it happened?

It's so strange. In my head, I can still see him at his desk. He is moving around. He turns sideways to talk to Chris. I can still hear his voice in my head. He is telling a joke and messing up the punchline.

This is the second student I have lost. Why do I stay in this profession when I know that my attachment to my students will devour me in times like these?

Rest in peace, Wesley. You are missed.

Second semester = fresh start

This week has been a vast improvement from last week and many of the weeks prior to that. My students have a new daily routine, courtesy of me, and they are adjusting quite well. I don't think I have ever had them engaged for so much of the class period before. I am hoping this change will continue to provide me with less stress from my job.

I'm in...for the second time this month!

I just received my acceptance letter for grad school at EMU! I will be receiving my official letter from the Office of Admissions in a week or so. I have to contact the coordinator to plan out my class load and thesis schedule (for a couple of years from now).

While EMU is NOT my first choice, it does have an adequate program with flexible scheduling. I am hoping that I can finish this quickly. I may do a master's program for German at Wayne State in a couple of years.

I started power walking with Claire today. It went well. More again tomorrow.

NO SCHOOL!!!

I had planned to pull together some sort of review activity this morning, as the ones I had used in the past weren't really what I was seeking this time around. Luckily, school is closed today, so I don't need to do anything. I will just give my exams tomorrow morning and the next day.

I was so happy to answer the phone this morning! Now, I can focus on cleaning and grading essays.

Seeking Buyer

I believe I have finally found a buyer for my little xylophone. I restored it and have not found many who are willing to spend the time (or money) to take care of it properly. I am hoping to sell it by the end of the week. I could use the extra money, as well as the extra space in my spare bedroom.

My marimba already takes up one wall, and I would like to set up my computer. I would also like to set up my keyboard - I will be connecting the synthesizer to the computer to aid in charting all of my compositions. I just may be able to put together several of my songs. I should see what it would take to become a songwriter. Most of the venues I've checked out offer very poor deals for the writer/composer. Where is the sense in that?

...

Semester exams...half days...kicking up a stronger regiment of exercise...rehearsal...many things to look forward to...

Survival

I see myself "surviving" this week and next. There is simply no magic here. My students are antsy; the semester end is creeping closer and closer. It is difficult to cultivate deep thoughts in students when they are inundated with projects and papers. I see them surviving, as well. Some will be okay, others will continue to rattle cages.

I have decided to change some of my class policies for the second semester. It will be a tough transition, but the school needs certain things and I know of only a few ways to achieve them. It will be an uphill battle, but I am ready.

I'M IN!!!

I received an email today from the local community band...I'm in! I will start off the new season with rehearsal this Thursday night. I am thrilled. I haven't been part of a group in a while. I've been teaching percussion technique since 2001, though, so I have kept up with it.

I'm in!

I'm in!

I'm in!

I returned to work today. It wasn't quite as aggravating as I had anticipated, although I really began to wonder why I hadn't gone into computer programming & networking or business...or something even more lucrative. I chose a career field in which I could impact others. I don't always feel like I make that impact, especially when reading articles like this, but I keep trying.

I also set up a weekly fitness schedule with another teacher at work. She has been a rock for me this year, so I am happy she feels like she and I can work out and be friends. I seem to becoming friends with many of the older teachers. I find many of the younger teachers somewhat wishy-washy about their education ideals. There is one, however, who has not been a part of that. I like that she is a well-rounded and kind person who seems to know what is going on. I can go to her with some of my concerns about being one of the "younger" teachers and she understands where I am coming from. I may ask her if she would like to join us.

Now, all I am waiting for is the final word from Eastern - one of my references failed to send his letter on time. I will probably begin in the spring or possibly next fall. If that is the case, I may decide to just go to Wayne State. That is my first choice, anyhow. Jeremy is supposed to upgrade to captain in a couple of months, which will set us up a little bit better financially. I can consider working a different type of job while going to school. Preferably one that does not entail me grading essays all the time. The problem is that I won't have the income I have now. I hate moving backward, but it might be necessary.

Feeling a little goofy tonight...

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Date day

I drove to Waterford and spent the day with Jeremy. His trip had him just resting at a hotel for nine hours, so I decided to go visit. We went to Great Lakes Crossing and a couple of other places. I cannot remember the last time we just went out and had a date. It was so nice to escape the norm of our relationship.

Tomorrow we may drive up to Waterford again to see Joel, who, oddly enough, is now staying at the same hotel where Jeremy was today.


Other things on my mind...

#1 I have been working on my query and cover letters for fiction submissions. I am currently seeking agents and organizations. I plan to have a handful of stories out by February/March. I need to talk to J.D. Dolan at Western. He was always so helpful when I was in college (undergrad & grad), so I think I will ask him for a couple of contacts he would recommend. Most of my writing falls into the same genre as the bulk of Dolan's writing. Before sending them out, though, I will have Eric and possbily Brendan do several critiques (AGAIN!).

#2 I watched the hockey game tonight. I miss going to games. Perhaps I will ask my parents if they are willing to sell me some of their tickets. They usually just give them to me, but I would like to go more than once every six months.

#3 I absolutely LOVE doing housework. I always feel like I've accomplished something, even when all I did was wash the dishes.

Dave Chappelle as Rick James

Welcome, 2007!

You are a much needed escape from the trials of 2006.


Changes from the previous status quo:


1. Limit alcohol consumption to one to two drinks per month.

2. No fast food, not even when pressed for time.

3. No pizza, unless I make organic homemade pizza. (I will miss you, Jet's Pizza!)

4. A minimum of thirty minutes of cardio every day.

5. Count calories daily. Limit for first month = 1600, second month = 1500, third month = 1350...we'll see beyond that.

6. Follow a daily chore schedule for each room in my home.

7. Read at least two books (novels, biographies, etc.) each month.

8. Do yoga three times per week.

9. Join a music ensemble - I think Canton is looking at its newest percussionist.

10. Go to my doctor's regularly - dentist, regular physician, urologist (for my kindey stone problem), dietician, OB-GYN (to be honest, I am still holding off on this one).

Im Kopf.

Mein Kopf tut mir weh! Es ist keinem Kater, aber ich bin doch ausgetrocknet. Ich habe viel zu viel Stress und Ideen.